On Friday after a two-hour Arabic placement exam -- which was not the kindest re-introduction to school, but I'm thankful for how I did -- an old Williams friend and a new SOAS friend and I caught one of the last performances of As You Like It at the Globe. It was a lovely sunny day and our GBP5 groundling tickets got us right by the stage for the charmingly nuanced production.
On Saturday I watched my cousin get married The ceremony was beautiful and it was such a calm (though wistful) joy to watch him and his exquisite bride smile at each other. The service started at 2pm and the party went on till 10pm so by the time cleanup was over we were pretty tired, but I just felt so honoured to be both part of the family and in London at the right time.
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It seems like I have a very binary attention span: either I really really concentrate or I swap between things constantly. Case in point: I typed half a sentence of the preceding section then moved down to write this. Also: when I'm having a face-to-face conversation and get a text I often start replying the SMS then continue talking and forget to finish the text, which really doesn't help on either front.
Right now I have readings that I should do and stuff that I should write but don't really have to do anything urgently right now -- the last couple weeks have been more like a vacation than most of my summer, but no complaints whatsoever -- so I've been starting emails then beginning Facebook messages then writing another sentence of an email before trying to get Malaysian news sites to load again. Which is a huge waste of time. And I should be praying more about how I use the remaining 90 percent or so of my term in London.
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It's interesting that I forgot to mention in my last post that the only genuine antidote I've found to silly social insecurities is praying about how to love the people I meet rather than fretting about what they will think of me (and what I will think of them -- I hate how I sometimes judge people). Which the book 1 John totally anticipated: fear flees from perfect love much quicker than it does from reminders that I Am A Friendly Person. It's silly/frustrating/tragic how much I focus on myself.
It's equally silly/frustrating/tragic how I worry about people's reactions when a post on this blog goes all Christian midway. But since I can only blog authoritatively (ish) about myself, hopefully things are spicier when I remember to bring in my relationship with someone else, i.e. God. :)
1 comments:
darling girl, i miss you!! so much so that when we were at an urbana info meeting and someone said, "i think yy is going to be there," i accidentally yelled, "THEN I'M DEFINITELY GOING!" and everyone laughed at me. hahah. i don't even know if it's true that i'm def going.
but anyway! i feel ya on so many levels--i'll just say that. silly social insecurities, going christian half-blog and all.
finally. OH how i wish i could be in london with you right now. to see you, but also just to BE in LONDON (again)!! super super jealous. <3
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